Must you always speak your Mind?
It’s something to hear people talk to each other especially when they feel they have the right to say whatever they feel like saying, dumping all their acid from their heart all over the person. All for the sake of “truth’ and “freedom of expression”. When, what they are saying is just plain rude and hurtful, leaving the person feeling unloved and uncared for. But “they feel good” because they were able to get it all off their chest. But at what cost?
The Bible gives us instruction on how we are to communicate with each other.
In Colossians 4:6 (NIV) it states: “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”
And in Eph 4:15, it states: “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is Christ.”
Even though there are many scriptures that speak to this, I thought these two would do fine.
I can speak for myself when I say, It’s easy to point out flaws and problems in others, especially when it’s a spouse or children. But it is so hard expressing those issues without sounding judgmental or critical.
I know as Christians we sometimes feel the need to correct or be the “voice” of the Holy Spirit in a person’s life. But this can unfortunately turn us into “the spiritual police” or the “Judge and Jury” and always saying “Guilty”.
I believe this is not what Christ meant when he said, “Let your conversation be always full of grace”,
Grace, as undeserved favor, kindness and forgiveness toward a person. Considering their feelings, their frailties, their issues, their struggles and the fact that they are imperfect just like us.
One scripture I try to live by that helps me to be graceful is in Romans 15:1-NIV: “We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not please ourselves.”
It helps me to be patient, understanding and not so desperate to get my feelings heard. We are all at different levels in our walk. We may see all the flaws but what you may not know is how far they have come. Your words can give them hope or give them discouragement. “Death and life is in the power of the tongue.” (Proverbs 18:21)
So should you just say what you want? Should you give someone a piece of your mind?
No, we shouldn’t. I know it’s hard sometimes but we have to take ourselves out of the equation. It’s not about us really! It’s about the Christ in us. The “Truth”. That is why it is very important to pray first, for yourself and that person. Tell Jesus all about it. Allow him to shed his light on the situation. He will give you understanding and guide you on what to do. He may use us to speak for him but it will be based on his truth not ours.
That is where the other scripture come into play, ‘Speak the truth in love…” I think sometimes we get so caught up in trying to get heard that we forget about this major component, “Love”. Think about it, Love is patient, kind, not prideful, selfless, not vindictive, not faultfinding, peaceable, well behaved, hopeful, persistent, perseveres, protective and rejoices in the truth. (1Corinthians 13: 5-6) I know this is a tall order but it is what is expected as Christians. God says to Love each other, (1 Peter 4:8) “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins.”
Imagine how powerful that would be in a person’s life to know that you care more for them then your feelings about the offense/sin. You care that they receive all their blessings from God and that you want to rejoice with them living in the truth of God.
That is why the bible says to get the beam out of our own eye before we try to remove the speck for our brother’s eye. (Matthew 7:5 “paraphrased”)
Our beam is “self”. We can only see clearly when we look through the eyes of Jesus.
So, in closing, If God uses us to speak, we should humbly speak the “mind of Christ” not our own.
May God help us all, is my prayer.
3 Tips to having peace Everyday!
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your path. Prov.3:5-6
Think about it, We face so many things on a daily bases and with life moving so fast we find it necessary to make hasty decisions. Sounds familiar? The stress of not fully knowing if we made the right decision and what kind of results to expect can be unsettling. What if we could be confident in every step we take and every decision we make? Wouldn’t that give you great peace of mind, knowing that everything will work out for your good?
The Bible shows us just how to do that. Let’s look at Proverbs 3:5-6more closely.
“God is our Refuge and strength an ever-present help in time of trouble.” Psalm 46:1
“Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling.” Jude 1:24
“Be strong and courageous, Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6
“I have loved you with an everlasting love;” Jeremiah 31:3
These are just a few. But you get the point. When you know someone is for you 100% and wants what is best for you, wouldn’t you trust them? Now reflect on that and know that’s how God is towards us. But with an all knowing eye and an all powerful hand.
So in times of decisions bring it to him first, ask him for his direction.
This brings us to our second tip:
The Bible states:
“His ways are higher than our ways. Isaiah 55:8-9
“God sees not as man sees.” 1Samuel 16:7
There has been times when I have been hurt or upset about an offense but after submitting it to the Lord, He gave me the big picture and then the wisdom to deal with it appropriately. He has helped me see things through the eyes of Jesus, which is Love. It has been a great comfort.
This brings us to our 3rd tip:
3) “In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.”
In every decision, every concern… in everything, bring it to God in prayer. There is a song that says, ”Oh what peace we often forfeit and oh what needless pain we bear, all because we do not take it to the Lord in prayer;” Old habits die hard, I get it. But making a habit to pray first will help you not panic later. You can be confident that He knows what is best for you and those you love.
“For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Look for his direction and follow it. Many times we know what we should do but we don’t want to do it. This is where we must really decide on who we are going to serve; Ourselves or the Lord?
If we obey the Lord we will have blessings, joy and peace; We will have the assurance that he knows the whole picture, and wants what is best for us. Knowing this and acting on it will give you Great peace everyday.
“The Peace of God that passes all understanding, shall keep your heart and mind through Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7